Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt

"Fossati, Thomas (Nokia - GB)" <thomas.fossati@nokia.com> Wed, 31 August 2016 13:49 UTC

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From: "Fossati, Thomas (Nokia - GB)" <thomas.fossati@nokia.com>
To: Francis Dupont <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr>, "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: review of draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt
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Date: Wed, 31 Aug 2016 13:39:16 +0000
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Subject: Re: [Gen-art] review of draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt
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Hi Francis,

Thanks very much for your review time.

On 31/08/2016 13:41, "Francis Dupont" <Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr> wrote:
>I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
>Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
>by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
>like any other last call comments.
>
>For more information, please see the FAQ at
>
><http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.
>
>Document: draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt
>Reviewer: Francis Dupont
>Review Date: 20160829
>IETF LC End Date: 20160822
>IESG Telechat date: unknown
>
>Summary: Ready
>
>Major issues: None
>
>Minor issues: None
>
>Nits/editorial comments:
> - Abstract page 1: please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

OK

> - ToC page 3 and 11 page 29: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments

OK

> - 1 page 3: again please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

OK


> - 3 page 6, 5.4.2 page 12, 5.5 page 13, and 7 note 4 page 22:
>  i.e. -> i.e.,

OK


> - 5.3 page 9 (twice), 5.4.2 page 12, 6.2 page 16, 6.2 page 17 (3 times),
>   6.6 Fig 2 page 19, 7 note 7 page 22, 8.3 page 24, and 10.2 page 28:
>  e.g. -> e.g.,

OK

> - 5.4.1.1 page 10: IMHO the 1. Target CoAP URI ... should be on the
>  next page (BTW leave this to the RFC Editor).
>
> - 5.4.2.1 page 12: same comment about "2. Target CoAP URI ..."

As you say, this is something to be left as a note to the RFC editor.

> - 5.4.2.1 page 13: perhaps a missing "on" at the end of:
>  http://p.example.com/hc/?s=coap&hp=s.example.com&p=/light&q=

No, this example is meant to show that if the Target CoAP URI has no query
component then the template produces an explicit "q" with no value.

Cheers, thanks,
t

>Regards
>
>Francis.Dupont@fdupont.fr