Review of draft-ietf-mmusic-4572-update-11

Elwyn Davies <elwynd@dial.pipex.com> Tue, 24 January 2017 20:40 UTC

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From: Elwyn Davies <elwynd@dial.pipex.com>
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Subject: Review of draft-ietf-mmusic-4572-update-11
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Reviewer: Elwyn Davies
Review result: Ready

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-mmusic-4572-update-11
Reviewer: Elwyn Davies
Review Date: 2017-01-24
IETF LC End Date: 2017-01-26
IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat

Summary: Ready.  There are a couple of trivial nits mentioned below. 
Given that the draft has a minimal set of changes apart from the
addition of two sections, I have not read the unchanged pieces in
detail 

Major issues:
None

Minor issues:
None

Nits/editorial comments: 
s1, para 2: s/TLS protocol/The TLS protocol/ (as per RFC 4572)

s4, para 2: s/a new protocol identifier/the protocol identifier/ (it
isn't new any more)

s5.1: Suggest s/m- line/"m" line/  for consistency with s3.4

s5.1, para 1: s/e.g./e.g.,/

s5.1, para 4: s/that each used certificate matches/that each
certificate used matches/

s5.1, para 5: s/each used certificate matches/each certificate used
matches/

s8, para 5: ' This specification creates a new IANA registry named
"Hash Function Textual Names".'  
The registry is no longer new.  Perhaps s/creates a new IANA
registry/takes over the IANA registry from RFC 4572/