Re: [Mobopts] IRSG review of draft-irtf-mobopts-location-privacy-solutions-08.txt

On Tue, 2008-05-20 at 11:23 -0700, Rajeev Koodli wrote:
> 
> 
> Hello Michael,
> 
> 
> thank you for your detailed review. The authors will take a look and
> respond.
> 
> In the meanwhile, couple of quick replies below.
> 
> On Mon, May 19, 2008 at 1:00 AM, Michael Welzl
> <michael.welzl@uibk.ac.at> wrote:
>         
>         These rules also state that it must be very clear throughout
>         the
>         document that
>         it is not an IETF product and is not a standard. I'm not sure
>         if this is
>         really so clear in this case.
> 
> 
> This is a boilerplate issue for an IRTF RFC. The RFC coming from the
> IRTF stream makes it evident that it is not an IETF product or a
> standard. The boilerplate in the eventual RFC will capture that (it's
> hard to mention this throughout the document)

fine, i think

>         On the whole, the presentation is quite poor; while I have no
>         expertise
>         in
>         this field (which, by the way, makes it very hard for me to
>         comment on
>         technical issues), the document should be easier to read even
>         for
>         someone like me than it is in its current form.
> 
> 
> I understand. However, the document is fairly involved, and does
> assume familiarity with the nits and grits of IP mobility. 
> We will try to address your input below. However, I am afraid we
> cannot simplify it further technically.

i understand that - but it will automatically be simplified by
fixing the presentation, e.g. the missing terms at the beginning
make it especially hard to read. with this document, it was
hard for me to even concentrate on the actual technical content
because the presentation is so broken. once that's fixed, everything
will be easier to understand

cheers
michael

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