Re: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy
"Charles Eckel (eckelcu)" <eckelcu@cisco.com> Mon, 07 May 2018 20:26 UTC
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From: "Charles Eckel (eckelcu)" <eckelcu@cisco.com>
To: Alissa Cooper <alissa@cooperw.in>, "julien.meuric@orange.com" <julien.meuric@orange.com>
CC: "rtg-ads@ietf.org" <rtg-ads@ietf.org>, "draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy.all@ietf.org" <draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy.all@ietf.org>, "rtg-dir@ietf.org" <rtg-dir@ietf.org>, mtgvenue <mtgvenue@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy
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Date: Mon, 07 May 2018 20:26:24 +0000
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Subject: Re: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy
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HI Jullien, Thanks for your careful review and helpful feedback. I did not see any discussion on it. My apologies if I missed it. Please see my comments inline [cue]. -----Original Message----- From: Alissa Cooper <alissa@cooperw.in> Date: Monday, April 30, 2018 at 9:27 AM To: "julien.meuric@orange.com" <julien.meuric@orange.com> Cc: "rtg-ads@ietf.org" <rtg-ads@ietf.org>, "draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy.all@ietf.org" <draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy.all@ietf.org>, "rtg-dir@ietf.org" <rtg-dir@ietf.org>, "mtgvenue@ietf.org" <mtgvenue@ietf.org> Subject: Re: RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy Resent-From: <alias-bounces@ietf.org> Resent-To: <suresh@kaloom.com>, Pete Resnick <presnick@qti.qualcomm.com>, Charles Eckel <eckelcu@cisco.com>, <alissa@cooperw.in>, Charles Eckel <eckelcu@cisco.com> Resent-Date: Monday, April 30, 2018 at 9:27 AM Thanks. Added the WG on cc for any follow-up. Alissa > On Apr 24, 2018, at 6:09 AM, julien.meuric@orange.com wrote: > > Hello, > > I have been selected as the Routing Directorate reviewer for this draft. > The Routing Directorate seeks to review all routing or routing-related > drafts as they pass through IETF last call and IESG review. The purpose > of the review is to provide assistance to the Routing ADs. For more > information about the Routing Directorate, please see > http://trac.tools.ietf.org/area/rtg/trac/wiki/RtgDir > > Although these comments are primarily for the use of the Routing ADs, it > would be helpful if you could consider them along with any other IETF > Last Call comments that you receive, and strive to resolve them through > discussion or by updating the draft. > > Document: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meeting-policy-04 > Reviewer: Julien Meuric > Review Date: April 24, 2018 > IETF LC End Date: April 19, 2018 > Intended Status: BCP > > *Summary:* > The I-D seems almost ready for publication. I have some minor concerns > about this document that I think should be resolved before publication. > > *Comments:* > The choice of words sometimes feels to me a bit tough or too narrow. > However, I am not a native-speaker and I am not always used to set phrases. > Moreover, I suggest a few text tweaks, including probable nits that the > RFC Editor would certainly spot anyway. > > *Major Issues:* > No major issues found. > > *Minor Issues:* > To me, a couple of words may benefit from alternate terms: > - "location" sounds too specific for a continent, would not "region" or > "territory" fit better? [cue] Perhaps, but this use of "location" is consistent with its use in https://tools.ietf.org/html/draft-ietf-mtgvenue-iaoc-venue-selection-process-13, so I think it is best to stick with location. > - "travel pain" (used twice) feel strong, "travel effort" would convey a > similar idea in a smoother way. [cue] I would be okay with that change. > > In section 2, I am not sure that "a meeting in North America in March, a > meeting in Europe in July, and a meeting in Asia on November" is so > obviously a "typical cycle". I would thus drop that unnecessary text to > start with "The 1-1-1 policy", and update the following phrase "such a > cycle" into "a fixed cycle". [cue] Works for me, except I might use "a given cycle" rather than "a fixed cycle". > > > *Nits:* > - s/High level guidance for the meeting policy/High Level Guidance for > the Meeting Policy/ > - s/The 1-1-1-* meeting policy/The 1-1-1-* Meeting Policy/ > - s/regions. i.e.,/regions, i.e./ > - s/roughy/roughly/ > - s/we plan/We plan/ > - s/there were/There were/ > - s/meetings. e.g./meetings. E.g./ > - s/There have not been a large number/ There has not been a large > number/ [or "was not"? Defer to RFC Editor?] > - s/IETF54(/IETF54 (/ > - s/Implementation of the policy/Implementation of the Policy/ > - s/to assist/For assisting/ > - s/to provide/For providing/ > - s/Re-evaluation and changes to this policy/Re-evaluation and Changes > to this Policy/ [cue] I do not think the changes in capitalization are necessary. I am happy to it leave it to the RFC editor to decide. Cheers, Charles > > > Regards, > > Julien > > > _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ > > Ce message et ses pieces jointes peuvent contenir des informations confidentielles ou privilegiees et ne doivent donc > pas etre diffuses, exploites ou copies sans autorisation. Si vous avez recu ce message par erreur, veuillez le signaler > a l'expediteur et le detruire ainsi que les pieces jointes. 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- [RTG-DIR] RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-meet… julien.meuric
- Re: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-… Alissa Cooper
- Re: [RTG-DIR] RtgDir Review: draft-ietf-mtgvenue-… Charles Eckel (eckelcu)