[auth48] [AD] Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9268 <draft-ietf-6man-mtu-option-15> for your review - Author feedback

[Alanna Paloma <[e-mail]>]

Hi *Erik, Bob, and Gorry,

Thank you for your replies. We have updated the files as requested.

Note that we have reverted the text to <artwork> as requested. FYI, we used <dl> because it seemed appropriate use of the XML. If RFC 8200 were being published today, we would have used <dl> for that list. 

*Erik - As the AD, please review and confirm that the Implementation Status section should remain in this document. 
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-auth48diff.html 

The files have been posted here (please refresh):
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.xml
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.txt
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.html
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.pdf

The relevant diff files have been posted here:
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-diff.html (comprehensive diff)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-rfcdiff.html (comprehensive diff with changes side by side)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-lastdiff.html (last version to this one)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-lastrfcdiff.html (last version to this one with changes side by side)
https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-auth48diff.html (AUTH48 changes)

Please review the document carefully as documents do not change once published as RFCs.

We will await any further changes you may have and approvals from each author and *Erik prior to moving forward in the publication process.

Please see the AUTH48 status page for this document here:
https://www.rfc-editor.org/auth48/rfc9268

Thank you,
RFC Editor/ap

> On Aug 4, 2022, at 2:02 AM, Gorry Fairhurst <[e-mail]> wrote:
> 
> 
> 
> Thanks for this review. Please see below the detailed feedback following your review,
> 
>> -------- Forwarded Message --------
>> Subject: Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9268 <draft-ietf-6man-mtu-option-15> for your review
>> Date: Thu, 14 Jul 2022 08:03:11 -0700 (PDT)
>> From: [e-mail]
>> To: [e-mail], [e-mail]
>> CC: [e-mail], [e-mail], [e-mail], [e-mail], [e-mail], [e-mail]
>> 
>> 
>> Authors,
>> 
>> While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as necessary) the following questions, which are also in the XML file.
>> 
>> 1) <!-- [rfced] Please insert any keywords (beyond those that appear in the title) for use on https://www.rfc-editor.org/search. -->
> 
> Auth: These are our suggestions:
> DPLPMTUD
> PMTUD
>> 2) <!--[rfced] Figure titles: Would you like to provide captions for the figures in this document?
>> -->
> 
> Auth: Yes, please do add captions, as below:
> 
> NEW:
>  Figure 1: An example path between the source host and the destination host. 
> 
>  Figure 2: Three scenarios that arise from using the path shown in Figure 1.
> 
>  Figure 3: Format of the Minimum Path MTU Hop-by-Hop Option.
> 
>> 3) <!--[rfced] We see a number of author-inserted comments in the .xml file
>> for this document. We are unsure if these have been resolved. Please
>> review and let us know if these can be deleted or if they need to be
>> addressed.
>> -->
>> 
>> Please remove prior to publication.
> Auth: OK
> 
>> 4) <!-- [rfced] Section 5: Please review the formatting of the descriptions of the Minimum Path MTU Hop-by-Hop Option, and let us know if any changes are needed.
>> 
>> Original:
>> Option Type (see Section 4.2 of [RFC8200]):
>> 
>> BB 00 Skip over this option and continue processing.
>> 
>> C 1 Option data can change en route to the packet's final
>> destination.
>> 
>> TTTTT 10000 Option Type assigned from IANA [IANA-HBH].
>> 
>> Length: 4 The size of the value field in Option Data
>> field supports PMTU values from 0 to 65,534 octets, the
>> maximum size represented by the Path MTU option.
>> 
>> Min-PMTU: n 16-bits. The minimum MTU recorded along the path
>> in octets, reflecting the smallest link MTU that
>> the packet experienced along the path.
>> A value less than the IPv6 minimum link
>> MTU [RFC8200] MUST be ignored.
>> 
>> Rtn-PMTU: n 15-bits. The returned Path MTU field, carrying the 15
>> most significant bits of the latest received Min-PMTU
>> field for the forward path. The value zero means that
>> no Reported MTU is being returned.
>> 
>> R n 1-bit. R-Flag. Set by the source to signal that
>> the destination host should include the received
>> Rtn-PMTU field updated by the reported Min-PMTU value
>> when the destination host is to send a PMTU Option back
>> to the source host.
>> 
>> Current:
>> BB 00
>> 
>> Skip over this option and continue processing.
>> 
>> C 1
>> 
>> Option data can change en route to the packet's final
>> destination.
>> 
>> TTTTT 10000
>> 
>> Option Type assigned from IANA [IANA-HBH].
>> 
>> Length: 4
>> 
>> The size of the value field in the Option Data field
>> supports PMTU values from 0 to 65,534 octets, which is the
>> maximum size represented by the Path MTU option.
>> 
>> Min-PMTU: n
>> 
>> 16-bits. The minimum MTU recorded along the path in
>> octets, reflecting the smallest link MTU that the packet
>> experienced along the path. A value less than the IPv6
>> minimum link MTU [RFC8200] MUST be ignored.
>> 
>> Rtn-PMTU: n
>> 
>> 15-bits. The returned Path MTU field, carrying the 15
>> most significant bits of the latest received Min-PMTU
>> field for the forward path. The value zero means that no
>> Reported MTU is being returned.
>> 
>> R n
>> 
>> 1-bit. R-Flag. Set by the source to signal that the
>> destination host should include the received Rtn-PMTU
>> field updated by the reported Min-PMTU value when the
>> destination host is to send a PMTU Option back to the
>> source host.
>> -->
>> 
>> Auth: Bob raised an issuem about this proposal.
>> 5) <!--[rfced] Section 6.3: We note that the following text states that probe packets are used for "two distinct functions"; however, it is then followed by a list of four items. May we update this list to maintain the first two items and move the last two items into separate paragraphs?
>> 
>> Original:
>> PLPMTUD [RFC9000] uses probe packets for two distinct functions:
>> 
>> * Probe packets are used to confirm connectivity...
>> 
>> * A second use of probe packets is to explore if a path supports a
>> packet size greater than the current PLPMTU...
>> 
>> * The PMTU Hop-by-Hop Option Probe can be sent on packets that
>> include application data...
>> 
>> * Using a PMTU Probe on packets that do not carry application data
>> will avoid the need for loss recovery...
>> 
>> Perhaps:
>> PLPMTUD [RFC9000] uses probe packets for two distinct functions:
>> 
>> * Probe packets are used to confirm connectivity...
>> 
>> * A second use of probe packets is to explore if a path supports a
>> packet size greater than the current PLPMTU...
>> 
>> The PMTU Hop-by-Hop Option probe can be sent on packets that
>> include application data...
>> 
>> Using a PMTU probe on packets that do not carry application data
>> will avoid the need for loss recovery...
>> -->
> Auth: 
> This REF seems slightly wonky. 
> The RFC to be cited is RFC 8899. 
> The change itself looks OK.
> 
>> 6) <!-- [rfced] Section 6.3.5: We have updated "R-bit" to "R-Flag" in the following. Please let us know if any changes are necessary.
>> 
>> Original:
>> To bound the delay in discovering an increase in
>> the actual PMTU, a host with a link MTU larger than the current PMTU
>> SHOULD periodically send the MinPMTU HBH Option with the R-bit set.
>> 
>> Current:
>> To bound the delay in discovering an increase in
>> the actual PMTU, a host with a link MTU larger than the current PMTU
>> SHOULD periodically send the MinPMTU HBH Option with the R-Flag set.
>> -->
> Auth: Yes, we agree.
>> 7) <!-- [rfced] Section 7: IANA has recorded the following description in the "Destination Options and Hop-by-Hop Options" registry <https://www.iana.org/assignments/ipv6-parameters/>:
>> 
>> IANA registry: Path MTU Record Option
>> 
>> Should the description in the registry instead say "Minimum Path MTU Hop-by-Hop Option"?
>> -->
>> 
> Auth: Yes, we agree.
> 
>> 8) <!-- [rfced] Section 8.6: We are having difficulty parsing the following sentence. Does the forged packet cause a packet with a MinPMTU HBH option to be sent?
>> 
>> Current:
>> When a forged packet causes a packet to be sent including the MinPMTU
>> HBH option and the return path does not forward packets with this
>> option, the packet will be dropped (see Section 6.3.6).
>> Perhaps:
>> When a forged packet causes a packet that includes the MinPMTU HBH option to be sent and the return path does not forward packets with this option, the packet will be dropped (see Section 6.3.6).
>> -->
> Auth: Yes. This change looks good
> 
>> 9) <!--[rfced] Per RFC 7942 ("Improving Awareness of Running Code: The
>> Implementation Status Section"), may we remove the Implementation
>> Status section? -->
>> 
> Auth: This section seems correct, we are not sure why it should be removed. We think we should keep it, or keep it wiyh a preface that says  "At the time of publication..."
>> 10) <!--[rfced] Informative References: The titles of the following references don't match the information found at the provided URLs. Please review and let us know if/how these references should be updated. Note that if the Implementation Status section is removed, this question becomes moot.
>> Original:
>> 
>> [VPP_SRC] "VPP Source", <https://gerrit.fd.io/r/c/vpp/+/21948>.
> Auth: The link goes to a page titled "ip: HBH MTU recording for IPv6.” That seems correct.
> 
>> [WIRESHARK]
>> "Wireshark Network Protocol Analyzer",
>> <https://www.wireshark.org>.
> Auth: This seems correct.
> 
>> Perhaps:
>> 
>> [VPP_SRC] "vpp", commit 21948, ip: HBH MTU recording for IPv6,
>> <https://gerrit.fd.io/r/q/project:vpp>.
> Auth: That seems OK.
> 
>> 11) <!--[rfced] Terminology
>> 
>> a) Throughout the text, the following terminology appears to be
>> used inconsistently. Please review these occurrences and let us know
>> if/how they may be made consistent.
>> 
>> Minimum Path MTU (8 instances) vs. minimum Path MTU (2 instances)
>> Option (62 instances) vs. option (106 instances)
>> Option Data (9 instances) vs. option data (2 instances)
>> Reported MTU (1 instance) vs. reported MTU (1 instances)
>> 
>> b) For consistency, should parentheses be used in instances that label sizes?
>> 
>> For example: size (d') vs. size d' -->
>> 
>> Auth: ??? Bob
> Auth: We have a small preference for the Caps version. For example "Minimum Path MTU”.
> 
> Auth: We think “ size d’ “ is better without brackets.
> 
> When making this change please keep alignment with the end of each line in the diagram.
> 
> 12) <!--[rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of the online Style Guide <https://www.rfc-editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language> and let us know if any changes are needed. For example, please consider whether "black-holing" should be updated to "an infinite loop".
> Auth: 
> “black-holing” is a term commonly used in code and papers to refre to a "black hole" effect, as in astronomy. It is not the same as “an infinite loop”, and does not imply anything predjudicial about the word "black" only that no light is emitted from a black hole. The term is used extensivly in software and discussion and is defined in RFC8899.
> OLD: 
> Increasing the PMTU can result in black-holing (see Section 1.1 of [RFC8899])...
> NEW: 
> Increasing the PMTU can result in a path silently dropping packets (described as a black hole in [RFC8899])...
> 
> 
>> 
>> 
>> Thank you.
>> 
>> RFC Editor/ap/jm
>> 
>> 
>> On 7/14/22 9:58 AM, [e-mail] wrote:
>> 
>> *****IMPORTANT*****
>> 
>> Updated 2022/07/14
>> 
>> RFC Author(s):
>> --------------
>> 
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>> 
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>> Files -----
>> 
>> The files are available here:
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.xml
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.html
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.pdf
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.txt
>> 
>> Diff file of the text:
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-diff.html
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-rfcdiff.html (side by side)
>> 
>> Diff of the XML: https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268-xmldiff1.html
>> 
>> The following files are provided to facilitate creation of your own diff files of the XML.
>> Initial XMLv3 created using XMLv2 as input:
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.original.v2v3.xml
>> XMLv3 file that is a best effort to capture v3-related format updates only: https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9268.form.xml
>> 
>> 
>> Tracking progress
>> -----------------
>> 
>> The details of the AUTH48 status of your document are here:
>> https://www.rfc-editor.org/auth48/rfc9268
>> 
>> Please let us know if you have any questions.
>> Thank you for your cooperation,
>> 
>> RFC Editor
>> 
>> --------------------------------------
>> RFC9268 (draft-ietf-6man-mtu-option-15)
>> 
>> Title : IPv6 Minimum Path MTU Hop-by-Hop Option
>> Author(s) : B. Hinden, G. Fairhurst
>> WG Chair(s) : Bob Hinden, Ole Trøan, Jen Linkova
>> 
>> Area Director(s) : Erik Kline, Éric Vyncke
>> 
> 
> Please let us know how you plan to proceed.
> 
> Best wishes,
> 
> Gorry & Bob
> 
> 
> 
>