Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-6lo-backbone-router-14

Alissa Cooper <alissa@cooperw.in> Wed, 19 February 2020 19:59 UTC

Return-Path: <alissa@cooperw.in>
X-Original-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Delivered-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id DB43012092B; Wed, 19 Feb 2020 11:59:09 -0800 (PST)
X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com
X-Spam-Flag: NO
X-Spam-Score: -2.7
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=-2.7 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, DKIM_SIGNED=0.1, DKIM_VALID=-0.1, DKIM_VALID_AU=-0.1, HTML_MESSAGE=0.001, RCVD_IN_DNSWL_LOW=-0.7, SPF_PASS=-0.001] autolearn=ham autolearn_force=no
Authentication-Results: ietfa.amsl.com (amavisd-new); dkim=pass (2048-bit key) header.d=cooperw.in header.b=0wu3Vgu+; dkim=pass (2048-bit key) header.d=messagingengine.com header.b=mp+YRBxe
Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id jw6TFzsG5d5l; Wed, 19 Feb 2020 11:59:06 -0800 (PST)
Received: from wout5-smtp.messagingengine.com (wout5-smtp.messagingengine.com [64.147.123.21]) (using TLSv1.2 with cipher AECDH-AES256-SHA (256/256 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id DE4441208D4; Wed, 19 Feb 2020 11:59:05 -0800 (PST)
Received: from compute7.internal (compute7.nyi.internal [10.202.2.47]) by mailout.west.internal (Postfix) with ESMTP id B31C0706; Wed, 19 Feb 2020 14:59:04 -0500 (EST)
Received: from mailfrontend1 ([10.202.2.162]) by compute7.internal (MEProxy); Wed, 19 Feb 2020 14:59:05 -0500
DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; d=cooperw.in; h= from:message-id:content-type:mime-version:subject:date :in-reply-to:cc:to:references; s=fm2; bh=kSWPORRnvmwys5SzyyN7yzK VXC0pbxfX8Uvl9ycsIQ8=; b=0wu3Vgu+J1mCR1nvGMDKaBlIzjzJevCGwxANojN 9EPmtfZb78h11aeJC0De5bx+vyW+cyK+p2MfOQIKnDYxmCS0JYRaWfUbI9i1SKJB skxbgofQrQlFtZ4qegnpgEJLP5PwczOutIZTl9rCk0oA1uvyEIoZzOobG5pKmxNo 34w0RWKnFjv30vfJLr935GeZN2gMPeY1jlqloXVlDTCETnhGESuHynn6GzNubZ6B J0PpjTDI21QgLph0gPiThbA5Y+5MNRurqOkczrIxbOSbBMifiRCybl/QBao8rPpi KK3bPUvVjwml4Rqyy2U/05RuIOCqtLs7P3OMRexRhYliaVQ==
DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha256; c=relaxed/relaxed; d= messagingengine.com; h=cc:content-type:date:from:in-reply-to :message-id:mime-version:references:subject:to:x-me-proxy :x-me-proxy:x-me-sender:x-me-sender:x-sasl-enc; s=fm2; bh=kSWPOR Rnvmwys5SzyyN7yzKVXC0pbxfX8Uvl9ycsIQ8=; b=mp+YRBxeSb89XUblb9aFGw CW2HrCp6TA7nw+YUdT4xbU8l1hAnyaKAGJRa/b+Fopn7k9k5Ag9vlnEOgac0SOXA aLTuCni0b2HdVeIPARqTcz6NsM2u88eKyGsnreYlBaHNALgnFGYQKWflvBqIlkAE 3Z+Vxray33C6Q1VeMvWb8bajIam7iFVNgAxME19iA7dkrM019TaziLOJYJir8r8y cIpnPAMBQ3+Sa1n+eQBNCIo8Pieu5gaGxkX6zdk3DbUGvaE5l9SUpU9OJuzbwjar tE1fbn5AJtumGoDSgivEDLAUYDkcNpehV3wQSYFq3GoXYCCB5z4BxNxwLJsJBfaQ ==
X-ME-Sender: <xms:h5NNXtB4V_qpzhOXMpbBy7UpXIYr6mnz9a-aYnqgI27yjGC8JC4ahA>
X-ME-Proxy-Cause: gggruggvucftvghtrhhoucdtuddrgedugedrkedtgddufeefucetufdoteggodetrfdotf fvucfrrhhofhhilhgvmecuhfgrshhtofgrihhlpdfqfgfvpdfurfetoffkrfgpnffqhgen uceurghilhhouhhtmecufedttdenucesvcftvggtihhpihgvnhhtshculddquddttddmne cujfgurhephffktgggufffjgfvfhfosegrtdhmrehhtdejnecuhfhrohhmpeetlhhishhs rgcuvehoohhpvghruceorghlihhsshgrsegtohhophgvrhifrdhinheqnecukfhppeduje efrdefkedruddujedrkedvnecuvehluhhsthgvrhfuihiivgeptdenucfrrghrrghmpehm rghilhhfrhhomheprghlihhsshgrsegtohhophgvrhifrdhinh
X-ME-Proxy: <xmx:h5NNXkfOT9dJIumKxTt-s5i-h3GdL5dR-1Fo7tkJRxpvw29UTQ5bkQ> <xmx:h5NNXqiJWrmzIUaR1WbYZV1icULoIfrYJho-tTVimoF1wRnHvrzyRw> <xmx:h5NNXko_rrUb8-X9BDvFxMsdjsPDE_5gRpm3TSrYvimCtpA5zoK8mg> <xmx:iJNNXsGa_AsXoA8tGz_6OZufE0we-FmTOibtfewH_Jdb5zVCwo4Lsw>
Received: from rtp-alcoop-nitro2.cisco.com (unknown [173.38.117.82]) by mail.messagingengine.com (Postfix) with ESMTPA id 62E323280060; Wed, 19 Feb 2020 14:59:03 -0500 (EST)
From: Alissa Cooper <alissa@cooperw.in>
Message-Id: <A690E762-2B65-49DD-8A69-7312A65DD540@cooperw.in>
Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="Apple-Mail=_A8BC16EC-3411-4FA5-9D92-B4B50063FD73"
Mime-Version: 1.0 (Mac OS X Mail 11.5 \(3445.9.1\))
Date: Wed, 19 Feb 2020 14:59:04 -0500
In-Reply-To: <43418FF0-2E98-4720-BB23-B0032E70038E@cisco.com>
Cc: "last-call@ietf.org" <last-call@ietf.org>, "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>, "draft-ietf-6lo-backbone-router.all@ietf.org" <draft-ietf-6lo-backbone-router.all@ietf.org>, "6lo@ietf.org" <6lo@ietf.org>
To: "Pascal Thubert (pthubert)" <pthubert@cisco.com>, elwynd <elwynd@googlemail.com>
References: <MN2PR11MB356504208DA4085EC8A347B4D81C0@MN2PR11MB3565.namprd11.prod.outlook.com> <5e3dbec6.1c69fb81.1f440.717b@mx.google.com> <43418FF0-2E98-4720-BB23-B0032E70038E@cisco.com>
X-Mailer: Apple Mail (2.3445.9.1)
Archived-At: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/P0pPM-ae0L6cLu_S8kETgSUypHY>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-6lo-backbone-router-14
X-BeenThere: gen-art@ietf.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.29
Precedence: list
List-Id: "GEN-ART: General Area Review Team" <gen-art.ietf.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/options/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/browse/gen-art/>
List-Post: <mailto:gen-art@ietf.org>
List-Help: <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Wed, 19 Feb 2020 19:59:15 -0000

Elwyn, thanks for your review. Pascal, thanks for your responses. I entered a No Objection ballot.

Alissa


> On Feb 7, 2020, at 2:54 PM, Pascal Thubert (pthubert) <pthubert@cisco.com> wrote:
> 
> Hello Elwyn
> 
> I implemented it on Cisco IOS years ago. What really hurts is the delay between that and the spec being finalized. The gory details of what I had to do escape me now but at least I still have the code as reference.
> 
> Many thanks again !
> 
> Pascal
> 
>> Le 7 févr. 2020 à 20:47, elwynd <elwynd@googlemail.com> a écrit :
>> 
>> 
>> Hi, Pascal.
>> 
>> Thanks for the rapid turnround!
>> 
>> I did check the abbreviations list for the well-knownness of MAC.  There are a multitude of possible expansions so it is not marked as well-known.
>> 
>> But otherwise... that looks good and we are all done.
>> 
>> It is pretty complex system and I can't say that my brain was capable of running a proper simulation ;-) but it seemed to cover most of the bases that I could think of.  Are there existing implementations (I'd guess so!) - if so it might be worth mentioning somethng about them but that is a nice-to-have.
>> 
>> Cheers,
>> Elwyn
>> 
>> 
>> 
>> Sent from Samsung tablet.
>> 
>> 
>> -------- Original message --------
>> From: "Pascal Thubert (pthubert)" <pthubert@cisco.com>
>> Date: 07/02/2020 13:36 (GMT+00:00)
>> To: Elwyn Davies <elwynd@dial.pipex.com>om>, gen-art@ietf.org
>> Cc: last-call@ietf.org, draft-ietf-6lo-backbone-router.all@ietf.org, 6lo@ietf.org
>> Subject: RE: Genart last call review of draft-ietf-6lo-backbone-router-14
>> 
>> Hello Elwyn:
>> 
>> Many thanks for your review!
>> 
>> Let's see below:
>> 
>> 
>> > General: s/i.e. /i.e., / (4 places), s/e.g. /e.g.,/ (2 places)
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > 
>> > Abbreviations: The definition of abbreviations in this document is inconistent.
>> > There is a list of abbreviations but it is not complete; many abbreviations are
>> > introduced in the text in the usual way and there are some that are not
>> > expanded. Please be consistent - a complete list would be helpful, especially
>> > as some are used before the abbreviations section.
>> 
>> Made a pass
>> 
>> 
>> > References to Neighbor Solicitation/Advertisement messages: The formats
>> > NS(xxxx) and NA(xxxx) are used to refer to various NS/NA messages. Please
>> > add an explanation of this convention and a definition of the various
>> > messages referred to.
>> 
>> Added the abbreviations
>> 
>> 
>> > Use of Layer-2 and Layer-3:  These terms are not normally  hyphenated.
>> 
>> Removed the hyphen.
>> 
>> > s1: Term STA used for a 'node': Please expand this abbreviation and possibly
>> > explain why it is used (I am unclear how it is derived).
>> 
>> STA and AP are 802.11 terminology,  STA means station I believe. Changed to 
>> "
>> connectivity to the end node (the Wi-Fi STA)
>> "
>> 
>> > 
>> > s1, para 5: s/Like/In the same way as/
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > 
>> > s1, para 5: ID is not a well-known abbreviation - please expand on first use.
>> 
>> Added in the "Abbreviation" section which is where it is first used
>> 
>> > 
>> > s1, para 9: Need to expand MAC.
>> 
>> I think we got directives from RFC editor not to expand very well-known terms. If my memory serves me that was one.
>> 
>> > 
>> > s2.2, "Sleeping Proxy": It might be useful to add in " which might be in a sleep
>> > state in a low power network".
>> 
>> "
>>    Sleeping Proxy
>> 
>>          A 6BBR acts as a Sleeping Proxy if it answers ND Neighbor
>>          Solicitations over the Backbone on behalf of the Registering
>>          Node which might be in a sleep state in a low power network.
>>          The Sleeping Proxy that is also a Bridging Proxy will
>>          preferably forward the relevant messages to the Registering
>>          Node as unicast frames in accord to the duty cycle of the
>>          Registering Node and let it respond.
>> 
>> 
>> "
>> 
>> > 
>> > s2.2, "Routing Proxy": Need to expand TLLA.
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > 
>> > s3, para 1: s/The next/The following/ 
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > 
>> > s3, 2nd set of bullets, bullet #2: s/This includes participating to the
>> >       solicited-node multicast address/This includes responding to messages
>> >       addressed tothe solicited-node multicast address/
>> 
>> The point is really the MLD thingy. What about:
>> 
>> "
>>      This includes joining the multicast group associated to
>>       the SNMA derived from the Registered Address as specified in
>>       section 7.2.1. of [RFC4861] over the Backbone.
>> 
>> "
>> 
>> > 
>> > s3, 2nd set of bullets, bullet #3: Expand NUD on first use (currently expanded
>> > twice in sss6 and 8).
>> 
>> Done and looked up /updated the other cases
>> 
>> > s3.1: Expand SLLAO on first use.
>> 
>> done
>> 
>> > s3.3, para at bottom of page 13 just before Figure 5: s/is a transmitted as a
>> > multicast/is transmitted as a multicast /
>> 
>> done
>> 
>> > s3.3, last para: s/suggests using RPL/suggests using the RPL routing protocol/
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > s3.4, last para: s/details/detail/
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > s3.5, para 1: s/as silently ignored./are silently ignored./
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > s4, last para: s/the MTU MUST have a same value/the MTU MUST have the
>> > same value/
>> 
>> Done, found several places
>> 
>> > s5, para 2: s/It results that a 6LBR MUST be capable of maintaining a
>> > state/Consequently a 6LBR MUST be capable of maintaining state/ 
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > s5, para 3: s/ which may be avoided of/ which may be avoided if/
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > s5, para 5: Expand TLLAO on first use.
>> 
>> Done
>> 
>> > s9: It would be useful to add a forward ref to s12 where the value of
>> > TENTATIVE_DURATION is defined.
>> 
>> Done, same for STALE_DURATION
>> 
>> > 
>> > s9.1: Remove empty second bullet.
>> 
>> Was gone already
>> 
>> > 
>> > Titles of ss9.1, 9.2 and 9.3: I Think these should be "Operations on...."
>> 
>> Changed
>> 
>> > 
>> > s9.2, 1st bullet: s/small timer/timer with a short setting/.  Is it possible to
>> > recommend any values here or indicate how to assign a suitable value?
>> 
>> Added " e.g., a few seconds to a minute;"
>> 
>> 
>> 
>> > 
>> > ss9.2, 9.3: It would be useful to add a forward ref to s12 where the value of
>> > STALE_DURATION is defined.
>> 
>> Done per the above comment
>> 
>> Many thanks again Elwyn!
>> 
>> I'm publishing right away as version 15 so people do not suffer from those nits again.
>> 
>> All the best
>> 
>> Pascal 
>> 
>> 
>> 
> _______________________________________________
> Gen-art mailing list
> Gen-art@ietf.org
> https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art