Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat-01
Christer Holmberg <christer.holmberg@ericsson.com> Thu, 08 October 2015 10:51 UTC
Return-Path: <christer.holmberg@ericsson.com>
X-Original-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Delivered-To: gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com
Received: from localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 8F06E1B2B2D for <gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com>; Thu, 8 Oct 2015 03:51:57 -0700 (PDT)
X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at amsl.com
X-Spam-Flag: NO
X-Spam-Score: -4.201
X-Spam-Level:
X-Spam-Status: No, score=-4.201 tagged_above=-999 required=5 tests=[BAYES_00=-1.9, RCVD_IN_DNSWL_MED=-2.3, SPF_PASS=-0.001] autolearn=ham
Received: from mail.ietf.org ([4.31.198.44]) by localhost (ietfa.amsl.com [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id qn5GnU2LkQEK for <gen-art@ietfa.amsl.com>; Thu, 8 Oct 2015 03:51:55 -0700 (PDT)
Received: from sesbmg23.ericsson.net (sesbmg23.ericsson.net [193.180.251.37]) (using TLSv1 with cipher DHE-RSA-AES256-SHA (256/256 bits)) (No client certificate requested) by ietfa.amsl.com (Postfix) with ESMTPS id 3FB581B2B27 for <gen-art@ietf.org>; Thu, 8 Oct 2015 03:51:55 -0700 (PDT)
X-AuditID: c1b4fb25-f79a26d00000149a-60-56164ac9ab9e
Received: from ESESSHC016.ericsson.se (Unknown_Domain [153.88.253.124]) by sesbmg23.ericsson.net (Symantec Mail Security) with SMTP id 4A.D5.05274.9CA46165; Thu, 8 Oct 2015 12:51:53 +0200 (CEST)
Received: from ESESSMB209.ericsson.se ([169.254.9.226]) by ESESSHC016.ericsson.se ([153.88.183.66]) with mapi id 14.03.0248.002; Thu, 8 Oct 2015 12:51:52 +0200
From: Christer Holmberg <christer.holmberg@ericsson.com>
To: Tore Anderson <tore@redpill-linpro.com>
Thread-Topic: Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat-01
Thread-Index: AdDxKwm6Kg1XXwLDQu6Os4qiD+X9DwPqk36AADYuEdA=
Date: Thu, 08 Oct 2015 10:51:51 +0000
Message-ID: <7594FB04B1934943A5C02806D1A2204B37B2F0AA@ESESSMB209.ericsson.se>
References: <7594FB04B1934943A5C02806D1A2204B37A84174@ESESSMB209.ericsson.se> <20151007115407.53e95348@echo.ms.redpill-linpro.com>
In-Reply-To: <20151007115407.53e95348@echo.ms.redpill-linpro.com>
Accept-Language: en-US
Content-Language: en-US
X-MS-Has-Attach:
X-MS-TNEF-Correlator:
x-originating-ip: [153.88.183.19]
Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
MIME-Version: 1.0
X-Brightmail-Tracker: H4sIAAAAAAAAA+NgFvrOLMWRmVeSWpSXmKPExsUyM+Jvje5JL7EwgxWLJCxOH/K2uPrqM4vF 6dmz2B2YPZYs+cnkcfjsUTaPL5c/swUwR3HZpKTmZJalFunbJXBlnPy3kL1gglTF4d7fbA2M k0W7GDk5JARMJA79f88KYYtJXLi3nq2LkYtDSOAoo8Sq/+cZQRJCAosZJbZ8Cexi5OBgE7CQ 6P6nDRIWEdCWaJ38mxmknllgGqPEr883wOqFBRwk/nd0sEEUOUq8/t7AAmFbSTy5sg1sGYuA isTxN2eZQGxeAV+J7ls/mCEWtzBKtJ//CZbgBGru/bscrJkR6Lrvp9aAxZkFxCVuPZnPBHG1 gMSSPeeZIWxRiZeP/0F9oyjR/rSBEaJeR2LB7k9sELa2xLKFr5khFgtKnJz5hGUCo9gsJGNn IWmZhaRlFpKWBYwsqxhFi1OLk3LTjYz1Uosyk4uL8/P08lJLNjECY+rglt+qOxgvv3E8xCjA wajEw7vATixMiDWxrLgy9xCjNAeLkjhvM9ODUCGB9MSS1OzU1ILUovii0pzU4kOMTBycUg2M 9W0y75doVZY5hqjyZOus4HjdPCNk79VN/FGsU+c3/BRa9efHnQvN+w4fPl7+x9W2JYQ/LDPr ZVN8pZnXWskjWyVmNOw2DJdnjpfN/TpJ+wizk0akts29t+talNed+bFyC9fpZZPznky9bxE3 JeHvvbcvdTI4piXJuvgWzj2vfvTt9Nxaw6pCJZbijERDLeai4kQAuRxcGYoCAAA=
Archived-At: <http://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/pefh2Mkxv1dYJWT4484W_oN8dfY>
Cc: "draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat.all@tools.ietf.org" <draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat.all@tools.ietf.org>, "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat-01
X-BeenThere: gen-art@ietf.org
X-Mailman-Version: 2.1.15
Precedence: list
List-Id: "GEN-ART: General Area Review Team" <gen-art.ietf.org>
List-Unsubscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/options/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=unsubscribe>
List-Archive: <https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/browse/gen-art/>
List-Post: <mailto:gen-art@ietf.org>
List-Help: <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=help>
List-Subscribe: <https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art>, <mailto:gen-art-request@ietf.org?subject=subscribe>
X-List-Received-Date: Thu, 08 Oct 2015 10:51:57 -0000
Hi Tore, I am happy with your suggestions on how to address my comments :) Thanks! Regards, Christer -----Original Message----- From: Tore Anderson [mailto:tore@redpill-linpro.com] Sent: 7. lokakuuta 2015 12:54 To: Christer Holmberg Cc: gen-art@ietf.org; draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat.all@tools.ietf.org Subject: Re: Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat-01 Hi again Christer, and thanks again for reviewing! * Christer Holmberg <christer.holmberg@ericsson.com> > Section 2 (Terminology): > ------------------------------ > > Q2_1: Many of the definitions have been defined in > draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc. Now they are re-defined, and sometimes with > a little different wording. > > For those definitions, my suggestion would be to say: > > "As defined in [draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc], a XXX is a blah blah blah" > - copy/pasting the text from draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc. Ack. I simply copied the definitions from -siit-dc (without the "As defined in..." prefix you proposed, since I think it would be rather repetitive). The only definition that is not identical between -siit-dc and -siit-dc-2xlat now is the ER one; the [draft-ietf-v6ops-siit-dc-2xlat] reference is removed in -siit-dc-2xlat, instead your Q2_2 suggestion is added. Hope that's fine. > Q2_2: In the Edge Relay, I think it would be good to mention the two > types (node-based and network-based). Fixed. References to the appropriate sections defining the two variants also added. > Section 4 (Deployment Considerations): > --------------------------------------------------- > > Q4_1: > > The text in section 4.1. says: > > "The IPv6 Path MTU between the ER and the > BR will typically be larger than the default value defined in Section > 4 of [RFC6145] (1280)," > > What is (1280)? Bytes. Fixed. > Section 5 (Intra-IDC IPv4 Communication): > --------------------------------------------------- > > Q5_1: > > The text in section 5.1 says: > > "If the BR supports hairpinning as described in Section 4.2 of I-D > .ietf-v6ops-siit-eam [I-D.ietf-v6ops-siit-eam]," > > I suggest to remove I-D.ietf-v6ops-siit-eam. The reference is enough. Fixed. > Section 7 (IANA Considerations): > ---------------------------------------- > > Q7_1: Do we normally remove the section if there are no requests from > IANA? Personally I prefer to keep the explicit "This draft makes no > request of the IANA." sentence. Fixed. > Section 8 (Security Considerations): > ---------------------------------------- > > Q8_1: > > The text says: > > "See the Security Considerations section in > [I-D.ietf-v6ops-siit-dc] for additional security considerations > applicable to the SIIT-DC architecture in general." > > I suggest to remove "additional". Fixed. > Q8_2: > > Is there a need to have section 8.1, or can all text be put in section > 8? I supposed not. Fixed. The changes implemented can be seen here: https://github.com/toreanderson/ietf/commit/c22ca60c39eb0d98506ce7bae252cf5327be6acf Please have a look and let me know if further changes are required, in your opinion. Thanks again! Best regards, Tore Anderson
- [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-siit… Christer Holmberg
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-… Tore Anderson
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-… Christer Holmberg
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART review of draft-ietf-v6ops-… Jari Arkko