[auth48] [C381] Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9303 <draft-ietf-lisp-sec-29> for your review

[[e-mail]]

Authors,

While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as necessary) 
the following questions, which are also in the XML file.

1) <!--[rfced] It appears that text may be missing in this sentence
after "defined in".  Should this refer to RFC 7835?  Please review and 
let us know how to update.

Original:
   LISP-SEC builds on top of the security mechanisms defined in to
   address the threats described in Section 4 by leveraging the trust
   relationships existing among the LISP entities
   ([I-D.ietf-lisp-rfc6833bis]) participating in the exchange of the
   Map-Request/Map-Reply messages.
-->   


2) <!-- [rfced] HMAC is expanded in this document as "Keyed-Hashing for Message 
Authentication (HMAC)".  While the title of RFC 2104 matches this expansion, 
we have changed it to "Hashed Message Authentication Code (HMAC)" as that is 
more common.  Please let us know if you strongly prefer that this be reverted.

   o  The Map-Server uses the ITR-OTK to compute a Keyed-Hashing for
      Message Authentication (HMAC) [RFC2104] that protects the
      integrity of the mapping data known to the Map-Server to prevent
      overclaiming attacks.
-->


3) <!-- [rfced] Should instances of "ECM message" be updated to read simply
"ECM" to avoid redundancy (if expanded, "ECM message" would read
"Encapsulated Control Message message"). Please review and let us know
if we may update the text. 

Example from Section 5 (original):
   2.  The Map-Resolver decapsulates the ECM message, decrypts the ITR-
       OTK, if needed, and forwards through the Mapping System the
       received Map-Request and the ITR-OTK, as part of a new ECM
       message.
-->   


4) <!-- [rfced] We note that RFC 3394 does not include any mention of
"msg-key" or "per-msg-key". Please review and let us know how to update the
citation.    

Original:
   According to [RFC3394] the per-msg-key is used to wrap the OTK
   with AES-KEY-WRAP-128.
-->   


5) <!-- [rfced] Should "128 less significant bits" be "128 least significant 
bits"?  Please review.

Original:
       The most significant
       64-bit are copied in the One-Time Key Preamble field, while the
       128 less significant bits are copied in the One-Time Key field of
       the LISP-SEC Authentication Data.

Perhaps:
       The most significant 64 bits
       are copied in the 'One-Time Key Preamble' field, while the 128
       least significant bits are copied in the 'One-Time Key' field of
       the LISP-SEC Authentication Data.
-->


6) <!--[rfced] It is unclear if "will be discarded" is referring to
"a replayed Map-Reply" or "the incoming Map-Reply". Please review
and let us know how this sentence should be updated.

Original:
   If a replayed Map-Reply arrives at the ITR, there is no <nonce,ITR-OTK>
   that matches the incoming Map-Reply and will be discarded.
   
Perhaps (referring "a replayed Map-Reply": 
   If a replayed Map-Reply arrives at the ITR, there is no <nonce,ITR-OTK>
   that matches the incoming Map-Reply and the replayed Map-Reply will be
   discarded.
-->


7) <!--[rfced] Throughout the text, the following term appears to be used 
inconsistently: 

key wrap vs. Key Wrap vs. key wrapping

Please review these occurrences and let us know
if/how this may be made consistent.
-->


8) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of the online 
Style Guide <https://www.rfc-editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language> 
and let us know if any changes are needed. Note that our script did not flag
any words in particular, but this should still be reviewed as a best practice.
-->  


Thank you.

RFC Editor


On Sep 16, 2022, at 3:56 PM, [e-mail] wrote:

*****IMPORTANT*****

Updated 2022/09/16

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--------------------------------------
RFC9303 (draft-ietf-lisp-sec-29)

Title            : LISP-Security (LISP-SEC)
Author(s)        : F. Maino, V. Ermagan, A. Cabellos, D. Saucez
WG Chair(s)      : Joel M. Halpern, Luigi Iannone
Area Director(s) : Alvaro Retana, John Scudder, Andrew Alston