Re: [Gen-art] [bess] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd-09

"Rabadan, Jorge (Nokia - US/Mountain View)" <jorge.rabadan@nokia.com> Mon, 04 January 2021 15:52 UTC

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From: "Rabadan, Jorge (Nokia - US/Mountain View)" <jorge.rabadan@nokia.com>
To: Russ Housley <housley@vigilsec.com>, Review Team <gen-art@ietf.org>
CC: "draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd.all@ietf.org" <draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd.all@ietf.org>, "bess@ietf.org" <bess@ietf.org>, "last-call@ietf.org" <last-call@ietf.org>
Thread-Topic: [bess] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd-09
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Subject: Re: [Gen-art] [bess] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd-09
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Hi Russ,

Thank you for the review!
Please see my comments in-line with [jorge].

Thanks again!
Jorge

From: BESS <bess-bounces@ietf.org> on behalf of Russ Housley via Datatracker <noreply@ietf.org>
Date: Friday, December 4, 2020 at 10:00 PM
To: gen-art@ietf.org <gen-art@ietf.org>
Cc: draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd.all@ietf.org <draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd.all@ietf.org>rg>, bess@ietf.org <bess@ietf.org>rg>, last-call@ietf.org <last-call@ietf.org>
Subject: [bess] Genart last call review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd-09
Reviewer: Russ Housley
Review result: Almost Ready

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at
<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-bess-evpn-proxy-arp-nd-09
Reviewer: Russ Housley
Review Date: 2020-12-04
IETF LC End Date: 2020-12-15
IESG Telechat date: unknown


Summary: Almost Ready


Major Concerns:

There is a normative downward reference to Informational RFC 6820.
It looks to me like this should be an informative reference.
[jorge] agreed. Changed.



Minor Concerns:

The Abstract seems very long.  I suggest:

   This document describes the EVPN Proxy-ARP/ND function, augmented
   by the capability of the ARP/ND Extended Community.  Together,
   these help operators of Internet Exchange Points (IXPs), Data
   Centers (DCs), and other networks deal with IPv4 and IPv6 address
   resolution issues associated with large Broadcast Domains (DBs) by
   reducing and even suppressing the flooding produced by address
   resolution in the EVPN network.
[jorge] ok, changed based on your suggestion.


Nits:

When there is a line break in the middle of "->", it is quite difficult
to read.  I hope there is a way to make the hyphen non-breaking.

s2.2: s/devices and therefore floods/devices, and therefore, floods/

s2.2: s/messages, however ARP/messages; however, ARP/

s6.5: s/IXP's peering network space/IXP peering network space/

s7: s/flooded, however the/flooded; however, the/

s7: s/will definitely protect/protects/
[jorge] done all the above, thanks.



IDnits reports:

  == The 'Updates: ' line in the draft header should list only the _numbers_
     of the RFCs which will be updated by this document (if approved); it
     should not include the word 'RFC' in the list.
[jorge] done, thanks.



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