Re: [IPsec] WG last call: draft-ietf-ipsecme-esp-null-heuristics-01

Tero Kivinen <kivinen@iki.fi> Tue, 22 September 2009 10:51 UTC

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Date: Tue, 22 Sep 2009 13:47:03 +0300
From: Tero Kivinen <kivinen@iki.fi>
To: Scott C Moonen <smoonen@us.ibm.com>
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Subject: Re: [IPsec] WG last call: draft-ietf-ipsecme-esp-null-heuristics-01
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Scott C Moonen writes:
> - Is Section 1.2 necessary?  None of these terms are used in this fashion 
> in this document.

True. Removed. 

> - page 8, "sees an new" => "sees a new"
> - page 8, "in the Section 8" => "in Section 8"

Fixed.

> - page 12, excessive space in "i.e.  UDP encapsulated"; perhaps replace 
> with comma.

xml2rfc seems to want to put it there, but that is something that can
be fixed in the final RFC editing phase.

> - page 16, "with a new SA which needs heuristics" => "produces a new SA 
> which needs heuristics and will benefit from the existing flows".

Fixed.

> - page 21, "things what needs" => "things that need"
> - page 21, suggest "optimize things" => "optimize steps", just to reduce 
> repetition
> - page 21, "For example implementation" => "For example, implementations"

Fixed.

> - page 25, I believe that DES-MAC has a 64-bit ICV (FIPS 113) and KPDK has 
> a 128-bit ICV (RFC 1828).

RFC4306 does not give reference to AUTH_DES_MAC, and the AUTH_KPDK_MD5
reference is to RFC1826 whic does not define it. I do not want to put
those there as both of them are actually quite unsecure and should not
be used anyways.

Changed to:

     // AUTH_DES_MAC and AUTH_KPDK_MD5 are left out from
     // this document.

> - page 30, for tunnel mode checks it might be worth just mentioning that 
> tunnel mode is inferred by protocol 4 for IPv4 and protocol 41 for IPv6.


Changed it to be:

     // Tunnel mode checks (protocol 4 for IPv4 and protocol 41 for
     // IPv6) is also left out from here to make the document shorter.
-- 
kivinen@iki.fi