Re: [auth48] [AD] AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9390 <draft-ietf-dime-group-signaling-14> for your review

[[e-mail]]

Dear Alana,

Thank you for your quick feedback.
Please find our response below.

Regards,

Lionel


Orange Restricted

> -----Message d'origine-----
> De : Alanna Paloma <[e-mail]>
> Envoyé : mardi 11 avril 2023 22:40
> À : MORAND Lionel INNOV/NET <[e-mail]>;
> [e-mail]
> Cc : [e-mail]; [e-mail]; [e-mail]; dime-
> [e-mail]; [e-mail]; [e-mail]; auth48archive@rfc-
> editor.org
> Objet : Re: [AD] AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9390 <draft-ietf-dime-group-signaling-14> for
> your review
> 
> Hi Lionel and AD*,
> 
> *Robert - As the AD, please review and approve of the updated text in Section
> 4.1.1 in the diff file below:
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390-auth48diff.html
> 
> Lionel - Thank you for your reply. We have updated the files accordingly. Please
> note that we have some additional queries:
> 
> 1) You provided the following expansions for the listed acronyms:
> 
> > GASR: Group-Abort-Session-Request
> > GASA: Group-Abort-Session-Answer
> > GSTA: Group-Session-Termination-Answer
> > GSTR: Group-Session-Termination-Request
> 
> We have added preceding text to introduce the acronyms. Please review and let us
> know of any concerns.
> 
> Current:
>    Additionally, the following acronyms are used in the tables below.
> 
>       GASR:  Group-Abort-Session-Request
> 
>       GASA:  Group-Abort-Session-Answer
> 
>       GSTA:  Group-Session-Termination-Answer
> 
>       GSTR:  Group-Session-Termination-Request

[[LM]] Thank you!

> 
> 2) Please clarify if “re-authorization request” or “Re-Authorization Request (RAR)”
> should be made consistent. If so, which form should be used throughout the
> document?
> 
> >> 11) <!--[rfced] Throughout the text, the following terminology
> >> appears to be used inconsistently.  Please review these occurrences
> >> and let us now if/how they may be made consistent.
> >>
> >> re-authorization request vs. Re-Authorization Request (RAR)
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] OK!

[[LM]] Sorry 😊 The point is that there is no inconsistency issue. One is "service-specific re-authorization request" whereas RAR is a one these re-authorization command defined in RFC6733. But I realized that we have missed something: RAR should be "Re-Auth-Request" and RAA should "Re-Auth-Answer" in some places.
Moreover the coma (,) should be removed in "service-specific, server-initiated request". Both changes are addressed below.

4.2.2. Removing a Session from a Session Group 

OLD:

When the Diameter server decides to remove a session from one or multiple particular session groups or from all session groups to which the session has been assigned beforehand, the server sends a Re-Authorization Request (RAR) or a service-specific, server-initiated request to the client, indicating the session in the Session-Id AVP of the request. The client sends a Re-Authorization Answer (RAA) or a service-specific answer to respond to the server's request.

NEW:

When the Diameter server decides to remove a session from one or multiple particular session groups or from all session groups to which the session has been assigned beforehand, the server sends a Re-Auth-Request (RAR) or a service-specific server-initiated request to the client, indicating the session in the Session-Id AVP of the request. The client sends a Re-Auth-Answer (RAA) or a service-specific answer to respond to the server's request.

4.2.3. Mid-session Group Assignment Modifications

OLD:

When a Diameter server decides to update assigned groups mid-session, it sends a Re-Authorization Request (RAR) message or a service-specific request to the client identifying the session for which the session group lists are to be updated. The client responds with a Re-Authorization Answer (RAA) message or a service-specific answer.

NEW:

When a Diameter server decides to update assigned groups mid-session, it sends a Re-Auth-Request (RAR) message or a service-specific request to the client identifying the session for which the session group lists are to be updated. The client responds with a Re-Auth-Answer (RAA) message or a service-specific answer.


4.4.1. Sending Group Commands

OLD:

For example, when a server sends a Re-Authorization Request (RAR) or a service-specific, server-initiated request to the client, it indicates to the client to follow the request according to one of three possible procedures.

NEW:

For example, when a server sends a Re-Auth-Request (RAR) or a service-specific server-initiated request to the client, it indicates to the client to follow the request according to one of three possible procedures.

> 
> The files have been posted here (please refresh):
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.xml
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.txt
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.html
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.pdf
> 
> The relevant diff files have been posted here:
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390-diff.html (comprehensive diff)
> https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390-auth48diff.html (AUTH48 changes)
> 
> Please review the document carefully and contact us with any further updates you
> may have.  Note that we do not make changes once a document is published as
> an RFC.
> 
> We will await any further changes you may have and approvals from each author
> and the *AD prior to moving forward in the publication process.
> 
> For the AUTH48 status of this document, please see:
>  https://www.rfc-editor.org/auth48/rfc9390
> 
> Thank you,
> RFC Editor/ap
> 
> > On Apr 11, 2023, at 2:19 AM, [e-mail] wrote:
> >
> > Hi,
> >
> > Thank you for your patience.
> > Please find below our feedback.
> >
> > Regards,
> >
> > Lionel
> >
> >
> > Orange Restricted
> >
> >> -----Message d'origine-----
> >> De : [e-mail] <[e-mail]> Envoyé :
> >> vendredi 24 mars 2023 18:08 À : [e-mail]; [e-mail];
> >> MORAND Lionel INNOV/NET <[e-mail]> Cc :
> >> [e-mail]; [e-mail]; [e-mail];
> >> [e-mail]; [e-mail]; [e-mail]
> >> Objet : Re: AUTH48: RFC-to-be 9390
> >> <draft-ietf-dime-group-signaling-14> for your review
> >>
> >> Authors,
> >>
> >> While reviewing this document during AUTH48, please resolve (as
> >> necessary) the following questions, which are also in the XML file.
> >>
> >> 1) <!-- [rfced] Please insert any keywords (beyond those that appear
> >> in the title) for use on https://www.rfc-editor.org/search. -->
> >
> > [[LM]] Nothing to add.
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 2) <!--[rfced] For clarity, may we update this sentence below?
> >>
> >> Original:
> >>   If the Diameter server accepts the client's request for a group
> >>   assignment, the server MUST assign the new session to each of the one
> >>   or multiple identified session groups when present in the Session-
> >>   Group-Info AVP.
> >>
> >> Perhaps:
> >>   If the Diameter server accepts the client's request for a group
> >>   assignment, the server MUST assign the new session to each (one or more)
> >>   of the identified session groups when present in the Session-
> >>   Group-Info AVP.
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] We agree!
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 3) <!--[rfced] May we update instances of "service-specific auth" to
> >> be "service-specific authorization"?
> >>
> >> Original:
> >>   When sending the response to the client, e.g., a service-specific auth
> >>   response as per NASREQ AA-Answer [RFC7155], the server MUST include
> >>   all Session-Group-Info AVPs as received in the client's request.
> >>
> >> Perhaps:
> >>   When sending the response to the client, e.g., a service-specific authorization
> >>   response as per NASREQ AA-Answer [RFC7155], the server MUST include
> >>   all Session-Group-Info AVPs as received in the client's request.
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]]  in the present case, it can only be "authorization". And, as it is "e.g." it is
> fine to say "service-specification authorization".
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 4) <!-- [rfced] We are having trouble parsing the latter part of this sentence.
> >> Please consider whether the suggested update correctly conveys the
> >> intended meaning.
> >>
> >> Original:
> >>   In such case, the response to the group command MUST
> >>   NOT identify any group but identify solely the single session for
> >>   which the command has been processed.
> >>
> >> Suggested:
> >>   In such case, the response to the group command MUST
> >>   NOT identify any group other than the single session for
> >>   which the command has been processed.
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] The node can request to process a request for all sessions assigned to
> one or multiple groups identified in the request. But the receiving node can decide
> to treat the request only for the Session-Id included in the request.
> >
> > Proposed clarification:
> >
> > OLD:
> >
> >     In such case, the response to the group command MUST
> >     NOT identify any group but identify solely the single session for
> >     which the command has been processed.
> >
> > NEW:
> >
> >    In such case, the response to the group command MUST
> >    NOT include any group identifier but only the Session-Id identifying the
> session for
> >    which the command has been processed.
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 5) <!-- [rfced] Please review each artwork element in the xml file.
> >> Specifically, should any artwork element be tagged as sourcecode or
> >> another element?
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] OK. None of the artwork element should be tagged as sourcecode.
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 6) <!-- [rfced] Is the following general guidance for future
> >> registries, or is it guidance for IANA in setting up these two
> >> registries and it should be removed since the registries have already been
> created?
> >>
> >> Original:
> >>   The AVP names can be used as registry names
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] only guidance for IANA. Can be removed when processed.
> >>
> >>
> >> 7) <!-- [rfced] Would you like the references to be alphabetized or
> >> left in their current order?
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] no specific preference. It is actually based on the first occurrence but any
> order would be fine for us.
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 8) <!--[rfced] We have lowercased "Service-Specific" in the sentence
> >> below, as there are case no occurrences of the capitalized form used in RFC
> 6733.
> >> Please let us know if you have any conerns.
> >>
> >> Original:
> >>   As in [RFC6733], the term
> >>   Service-Specific below refers to a message defined in a Diameter
> >>   application (e.g., Mobile IPv4, NASREQ).
> >>
> >> Perhaps:
> >>   As in [RFC6733], the term
> >>   'service-specific' below refers to a message defined in a Diameter
> >>   application (e.g., Mobile IPv4, NASREQ).
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] OK!
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 9) <!--[rfced] Should Tables 2 and 3 have titles? Please review, and
> >> provide titles if desired. -->
> >>
> > [[LM]] OK! For sake of clarity:
> >
> > OLD:
> >
> > Table 2
> >
> > NEW:
> >
> > Table 2: Group Authorization Session State Machine for Stateful Client
> >
> > OLD:
> >
> > Table 3
> >
> > New:
> >
> > Table 3: Group Authorization Session State Machine for Stateful Server
> >
> >>
> >> 10) <!--[rfced] How should the following acronyms that appear in
> >> Tables 2 and 3 be expanded?  Would it be helpful to include text that
> >> precedes Tables 2 and 3 to define the expansions of these acronyms?
> >>
> >>  GASR
> >>  GASA
> >>  GSTA
> >>  GSTR
> >> -->
> >>
> >
> > [[LM]] it would not arm to list all of them:
> >
> > GASR: Group-Abort-Session-Request
> > GASA: Group-Abort-Session-Answer
> > GSTA: Group-Session-Termination-Answer
> > GSTR: Group-Session-Termination-Request
> >
> >>
> >> 11) <!--[rfced] Throughout the text, the following terminology
> >> appears to be used inconsistently.  Please review these occurrences
> >> and let us now if/how they may be made consistent.
> >>
> >> result code vs. Result-Code
> >
> > [[LM]] No inconsistency here. "result code" is a value. "Result-Code" is the AVP.
> >
> >> re-authorization request vs. Re-Authorization Request (RAR)
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] OK!
> >
> >>
> >>
> >> 12) <!-- [rfced] Please review the "Inclusive Language" portion of
> >> the online Style Guide <https://www.rfc-
> >> editor.org/styleguide/part2/#inclusive_language> and let us know if
> >> any changes are needed.
> >>
> >> For example, please consider whether "natively" should be updated.
> >> -->
> >
> > [[LM]] only one occurrence.
> >
> > OLD:
> >
> >   Newly defined Diameter applications may natively support Diameter
> >   session grouping and group operations.  Such applications provide
> >   intrinsic discovery for the support of session grouping capability
> >   using the assigned Application Id advertised during the capability
> >   exchange phase described in Section 5.3 of [RFC6733].
> >
> > NEW:
> >
> >   Newly defined Diameter applications may intrinsically support Diameter
> >   session grouping and group operations.  In such a case, there is no need
> >   of a specific discovery mechanism for the support of session grouping
> >   capability besides the discovery of the Application Id assigned to the
> >   application advertised during the capability exchange phase described in
> >   Section 5.3 of [RFC6733].
> >
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Thank you.
> >>
> >> RFC Editor
> >>
> >>
> >> On Mar 24, 2023, at 10:05 AM, [e-mail] wrote:
> >>
> >> *****IMPORTANT*****
> >>
> >> Updated 2023/03/24
> >>
> >> RFC Author(s):
> >> --------------
> >>
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> >> Files
> >> -----
> >>
> >> The files are available here:
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.xml
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.html
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.pdf
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.txt
> >>
> >> Diff file of the text:
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390-diff.html
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390-rfcdiff.html (side by
> >> side)
> >>
> >> Diff of the XML:
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390-xmldiff1.html
> >>
> >> The following files are provided to facilitate creation of your own
> >> diff files of the XML.
> >>
> >> Initial XMLv3 created using XMLv2 as input:
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.original.v2v3.xml
> >>
> >> XMLv3 file that is a best effort to capture v3-related format updates
> >> only:
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/authors/rfc9390.form.xml
> >>
> >>
> >> Tracking progress
> >> -----------------
> >>
> >> The details of the AUTH48 status of your document are here:
> >>   https://www.rfc-editor.org/auth48/rfc9390
> >>
> >> Please let us know if you have any questions.
> >>
> >> Thank you for your cooperation,
> >>
> >> RFC Editor
> >>
> >> --------------------------------------
> >> RFC9390 (draft-ietf-dime-group-signaling-14)
> >>
> >> Title            : Diameter Group Signaling
> >> Author(s)        : M. Jones, M. Liebsch, L. Morand
> >> WG Chair(s)      : Jouni Korhonen, Lionel Morand
> >> Area Director(s) : Warren Kumari, Robert Wilton
> >>
> >
> >
> ______________________________________________________________________
> > ___________________________________________________
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_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Ce message et ses pieces jointes peuvent contenir des informations confidentielles ou privilegiees et ne doivent donc
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