Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building-08
Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com> Mon, 23 March 2015 20:03 UTC
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From: Meral Shirazipour <meral.shirazipour@ericsson.com>
To: "consultancy@vanderstok.org" <consultancy@vanderstok.org>
Thread-Topic: Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building-08
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Date: Mon, 23 Mar 2015 20:03:24 +0000
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Cc: Alvaro Retana <aretana@cisco.com>, "gen-art@ietf.org" <gen-art@ietf.org>, "adrian@olddog.co.uk" <adrian@olddog.co.uk>, "draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building.all@tools.ietf.org" <draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building.all@tools.ietf.org>
Subject: Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building-08
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Hi, Thanks for considering the comments. The link is ok I think, some spaces within the url were causing an error. This works: [occuswitch] http://www.philipslightingcontrols.com/assets/cms/uploads/files/osw/MK_OSWNETBROC_5.pdf, May 2012. Best, Meral -----Original Message----- From: peter van der Stok [mailto:stokcons@xs4all.nl] Sent: Monday, March 23, 2015 12:18 PM To: adrian@olddog.co.uk Cc: consultancy@vanderstok.org; Meral Shirazipour; draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building.all@tools.ietf.org; gen-art@ietf.org; Alvaro Retana Subject: RE: Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building-08 Hi Adrian, good news. I try to do the update this week. Greetings, thanks, Peter Adrian Farrel schreef op 2015-03-23 20:12: > Hi Peter, > > This all looks good. > The changes are small, but it would be worth catching them in a new > revision. > Please post it when you have it, no need to check with me. > > Once you've done that, we'll hand it over to Alvaro as the incoming > AD, and he can put it on an IESG telechat. > > Cheers, > Adrian > > >> -----Original Message----- >> From: peter van der Stok [mailto:stokcons@xs4all.nl] >> Sent: 23 March 2015 14:49 >> To: Meral Shirazipour >> Cc: draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building.all@tools.ietf.org; > gen-art@ietf.org >> Subject: Re: Gen-ART Last Call review of >> draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home- >> building-08 >> >> HI Meral, >> >> Thanks for the suggestions. >> I have no problem with any of them. I think they are quite justified. >> Thank you very much for pointing them out. >> Concerning scene and group control. I may suppress the word "scene". >> About [occuswitch] I have to look for a valid alternative. However, >> these links are maintained by a company, which changes information >> frequently. >> Sorry for missing out some of the acronyms. I thought I caught them >> out all. >> >> Greetings, >> >> Peter >> >> >> Meral Shirazipour schreef op 2015-03-22 21:28: >> > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background >> > on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at >> > http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq. >> > >> > Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call >> > comments you may receive. >> > >> > Document: draft-ietf-roll-applicability-home-building-08 >> > Reviewer: Meral Shirazipour >> > Review Date: 2015-03-21 >> > IETF LC End Date: 2015-03-23 >> > IESG Telechat date: NA >> > >> > >> > Summary: >> > This draft is ready to be published as Standards Track RFC but I >> > have some comments. >> > >> > Major issues: >> > >> > Minor issues: >> > >> > Nits/editorial comments: >> > -[Page 1], "RPL" first used in title/abstract, Would be good to >> > spell it out. >> > -[Page 5], Section 2, "Monitoring of functional correctness is at >> > least as important.". As important as what? (not clear) -[Page 5], >> > Section 2, "Devices typically communicate their status regularly >> > and send alarm messages notifying a malfunction of equipment or >> > network." >> > Not clear what equipment is? network node is an equipment? >> > -[Page 6], Section 2.1, "for large installation"--->"for a large >> > installation" >> > -[Page 8], Section 2.2.2, "fire detectors and the smoke dampers >> > need to be put in place to meet the stringent delay requirements." >> > Where can we find a value for the delay requirement of fire detectors? >> > A value or reference would be good. >> > -[Page 9], Section 2.2.4,"advanced scene and group control". Not >> > clear what "scene" means. >> > -[Page 13], Section 4.1, "assumes the role as >> > authoritative"--->"assumes the role of authoritative" >> > -[Page 16], section 4.1.8, please spell out first use CBC-MAC >> > (Cipher Block Chaining Message Authentication Code) -[Page 16], >> > section 4.1.10, it would be good to give the RFCs. >> > -[Page 16], section 4.2.4, MLE to spell out at first use "mesh link >> > establishment" >> > -[Page 22], "CoAp" first used in section 7.4, but spelled out in >> > section 8. >> > -[Page 18], section 5.1.1., "to throw away too late messages", how >> > are too late messages identified? >> > -[Page 27], [I-D.ietf-6lo-lowpanz] to be replaced by RFC7428 -[Page >> > 28], link to [occuswitch] to be verified. >> > -Through the document both "ms" and "msec" are used. Selecting one >> > for consistency would be better. >> > >> > Best Regards, >> > Meral >> > --- >> > Meral Shirazipour >> > Ericsson >> > Research >> > www.ericsson.com
- [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-ietf-… Meral Shirazipour
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-i… peter van der Stok
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-i… Adrian Farrel
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-i… peter van der Stok
- Re: [Gen-art] Gen-ART Last Call review of draft-i… Meral Shirazipour